Getting Props from Paul Bunyan

On our way through northern California, we stopped in a random CVS in Crescent City. I don’t remember why. We probably needed a charger for an iPad or something because that was ongoing issue throughout our trip. Regardless, thank goodness we did because of a super helpful cashier that I want to say was named Linda and so I will. Linda not only helped us find what we needed to in CVS, she more importantly pointed us to an excellent local joint that served seafood (Fisherman’s Restaurant) and randomly asked EA this tantalizing question: “So are you going to the Trees of Mystery?”

Trees of Mystery. What was it? We didn’t know. It was not on our agenda or even on our radar. But, come on, the place was called Trees of Mystery. What were the Trees of Mystery? Would we find Narnia? A haunted wood once investigated by Scooby-Doo? I don’t know if a place has been better named to pique my curiosity. After EA and I did some research, we decided this fantastical forest would be our first stop in the morning.

When you go on a long road trip, you are going to visit all types of places. There are state and national parks that are brimming with pristine beauty. Then there are the more kitschy tourist trap kinds of places that also contain beauty with a healthy dose of quirk. When you pull into the parking lot, you immediately know that Trees of Mystery is in the latter category.

Right out front, you are greeted by a giant Paul Bunyan and Babe the Blue Ox. And I mean literally greeted as Paul Bunyan bellows out “WELCOME TO TREEEEEEEES OF MYSTERYYYYYYYY!” and lots of other stuff. There was obviously a guy somewhere who was watching people and talking to us through Paul via a loudspeaker because it sure seemed like he was interacting with the guests. We’ll get back to that.

Once we paid for our tickets, we found ourselves in the midst of the awe-inspiring Redwoods. In the midst of these gorgeous giants were the roadside attraction types of things: a sky gondola ride through the forest, the Tall Tales of Paul Bunyan told through wood carvings, and a rope bridge that traversed through the Redwoods. It was this last attraction that was the biggest hit with me and the boys.

As you may or may not know, the Redwoods were the shooting location for the Forest Moon of Endor in Return of the Jedi. And the bridges in the trees definitely gave off the vibe of the Ewok Village. Was there a wood carving of Yoda with the caption “May the Forest Be With You”? Yes. Did I hum “Yub Nub” (the original song that ended RotJ) as we climbed through the trees? Also yes. Did our youngest son declare that this was definitely where the Ewok scenes were filmed even though it definitely was not? Absolutely.

It was all kind of goofy, but also kind of delightful. Listen, I don’t want Trees of Mystery in every corner of the natural world. I love the pristine beauty that we encountered in the Redwoods, Yosemite, and Joshua Tree. But there is also something a bit fun about these little spots of quirky randomness. Of course, I am partly descended from carnies so that probably explains a lot of it.

After we exited through the gift shop (and EA purchased a plush banana slug she named Paul), I was sitting beneath ol’ Paul Bunyan. I had one of those paper bracelets on that identified me as having paid the entry fee. I tore the bracelet off and put it in the trash can. That is when Paul Bunyan bellowed, “THANK YOU FOR USING THE GARBAGE RECEPTACLE!” I immediately replied, “You’re welcome, Paul,” which made the custodial lady who was standing a few feet away from me laugh.

None of that—seeing the majesty of those trees, the journey through Endor, getting thanked by Paul Bunyan—would have happened if we had not stopped in that CVS in Crescent City, California. One of my favorite parts of our road trip were the times when we thought something looked interesting and chased it. So thank you, Linda. Thanks, Trees of Mystery. And, again, you’re welcome, Paul.