To Jim on his 13th Birthday
Jim,
How are you thirteen? Yes, as we have discussed the numerous times you have excitedly asked whether I believed you were going to be a teenager, I technically know how. I was there when you were born and that was thirteen years ago today. It’s easy to connect the dots and know how we got here. And at the same time it seems like some kind of magic that the 6 pound, 8 ounce child that I first held in my arms in that Spartanburg hospital is the young man who is falling asleep in this room tonight.
Well, not quite falling asleep. You just asked me what you could buy with the $20 Nintendo gift card you got from your aunt, uncle, and cousins.
Because as far as your interests are concerned, you have completely followed your father down the nerdy rabbit hole. For the last week, our home has been completely consumed by the newest Zelda game. The music that you selected for the ride to school this morning was the Star Wars playlist and you will just randomly say to me, “Dad, Star Wars is pretty great, isn’t it?” You have devoured virtually every one of my graphic novels that I have allowed you to read, eagerly anticipate the latest issue of World’s Finest, and are a walking encyclopedia of DC Comics minutiae. So you’re welcome. Or I’m sorry. Not sure which it is yet. In all seriousness, I love it. It is so much fun to watch your imagination soar with all of these stories that I also love.
Speaking of stories, you have been working on a fantasy-inspired novel at school this entire year, but you will not tell your mom and I anything about it. You’re constantly typing it on your laptop at home. Your brother knows all sorts of things about it. I have seen illustrations of book cover ideas. There is no book in my entire life that I have wanted to read more badly than this book of yours yet you have expressed that you would like for us to wait until it’s done. So we will patiently and eagerly wait. Even as I wait, I am so proud of your creativity and confidence in trying to build new worlds in a novel.
We are proud of you for many other reasons too. I am proud of how much you love your friends. I was so proud when you wanted to start doing a devotional with some other kids in the youth group. I am proud of how you try to do the right thing. Ever since your personality started sprouting up, you have had a strong sense of fairness. It is my ardent prayer that this desire for justice will always be turned outward to help others. It’s an amazing thing to witness when you do.
You are not perfect. I wish you would cut your brother more slack. You get a bit of an attitude sometimes. And I’m already starting to see some of that teenage annoyance when you know your parents are right but don’t want to admit it (because we are right; we are brilliant, brilliant people). For example, you got really upset when a boss defeated you in Zelda and then even more upset when I said failure is a great teacher. Then you were cool with that idea when I said that even Yoda said that in The Last Jedi. And then I got mildly upset that you thought what I was saying was dumb until I dragged a space puppet into it. You are not perfect, but, my gosh, we are proud of you and we love you more than you can possibly imagine.
I know these last few months haven’t been easy. As much as I would like to shield you from the storms that life will throw at you, I cannot do that. There are going to be rough patches as you continue to grow up. Face them honestly and with grace. Know that your mom and I are always here for you. Your brother, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, and so many other people are here for you and love you. Never forget that God is with you as well.
Jim, you are so loved. Never ever forget that. I am so grateful that I get to be your dad. And I cannot wait to see what happens next. Happy Birthday, buddy! We love you with all of our hearts.
Love,
Dad